I don’t usually do serious posts, but this has been eating at me for days.
The other day, a friend and I got into a conversation about how we talk about our husbands. It got me thinking about women I’ve encountered who talk negatively about their husbands. I want to say one thing. I don’t want this to offend anyone, I just want to give you something to think about the next time you start talking about the man in your life.
Don’t share your spouses downfalls. It’s as simple as that. Not only are you talking bad about the person you should be highlighting, but you’re creating a bad impression of them for that person you’re talking to. The person that you claim to love should have your respect, and they should be able to trust that you have their back. You wouldn’t appreciate it if your husband was sharing all of your bad traits to his friends. Not only would you feel betrayed, but you would probably be embarrassed. I know I would feel that way! I have run into people who, one word after the other, would shoot down their husband. They would constantly talk about how stupid he was, how he didn’t ever do what she had “told” him to do, and how she was so annoyed with him all the time… Let me just say, this is NOT the first impression I want of your husband. It instantly gives me the picture that he is a lazy loser, and if, or when, I meet him, that will be what I expect! But what you should know is that, when I do meet him and he turns out to be a great guy, YOU end up looking like a jerk. Also, if he’s such an “idiot”, why are you with him? YOU chose to be with him, so are you saying that you chose to be with such a bad guy? So, when it comes down to it, YOU’RE the stupid one, am I right? Because only an idiot would knowingly be with someone who was not a top notch guy in their eyes…. right?
Your husband, lover, best friend, and supporter, deserves much MUCH more. So please, for your sake, your husbands sake, and MY sake, don’t talk bad about your man…
I do understand that sometimes, you get into a conversation with a close friend about your husband and something he did that bothered you, but just stop yourself. Sure you might feel embarrassed that you had to catch yourself, but you will be glad you did later. Also, it helps to talk to HIM about it instead. I have found that I don’t ever feel the need to trash talk my husband if I just talk to him about it first. Sure, it might hurt him at the time to hear that he’s doing something wrong or that he’s upsetting you in some way, but I can guarantee that he would rather hear it from you than to find out that all of your friends heard about it before he even knew he had messed up. That is probably the biggest issue in a situation like this. You get mad because he didn’t do something right, and you assume that he was just being lazy. But if you talk to him first, you might realize that there may have been a big miscommunication.
I know I’ve been a little all over the place today, but this really REALLY bothers me. So, if you ever thought that you might want to share dirt about your husband, or even boyfriend, with me, just don’t. I don’t want to hear it, ever. It’s not cute, no I cannot relate to you, and no, I’m not sorry.
I guess what I’m trying to convey here is that, if you have issues with your spouse, deal with them behind closed doors and with that person. You will be doing yourself a favor, and it will probably improve your relationship.
Communication is key y’all…. Communicate…
Ok, rant over! lol
HAK – Lindsey