Here I am once again, from what seems like a million years, bringing stories of my ever changing, yet stagnant life. Still working towards pulling our lives out of this rut, yet at the same moment, hiding any such struggle from our joyful, innocent minded children. The burden of it all continues to cloud my mind and weigh on me heavily, but my only hope is the faith that God has it all in his hands.
The summer has brought such joy and happiness to my girls. Splash pad, pools, bowling, and trips to the grandparents house have kept us busy, but the summer has only just begun. There is so much more ahead of us, but it seems as if its approaching far too quickly. The youngest of my girls, Kimberly, is turning one in a month, and I can only say to myself “but where has the time gone?”. It seems as if just yesterday, I was reminded once again just how painful, yet exhilarating, the experience of childbirth is. The time ticking away as each contraction caused me to grit my teeth and hope for the end. The reminder ever so often that I STILL was not finished. Then, the shortest moment of all, the final push, and there she was. My such surprising baby girl. She was the most perfect 9lb 5oz bundle of joy I had ever seen. Her chunky red cheeks and that firey red hair. I never knew I could love two people the exact same. But I quickly realized I could.
Now, she’s the same wonderful, chunky, and red cheeked little hunk of joy I fell in love with almost a whole year ago. She’s army crawling around the house getting into whatever she can reach, devours more than I can eat in one sitting, and is working her hardest to catch up to her big sissy.
Where did the time go? Where is my baby? You never realize how quickly those late nights and still snuggles pass you by. I find myself wishing I could have that again. Thinking that maybe another would feed that hunger. But then I remember that I only have a short time with my babies, and I want to remember it and be as much as a mommy that I can be before I am again taken away by another bundle of joy. Also, they’re expensive as hell!
As I plan her birthday, I just can’t believe that were here already, and that my oldest will be turning 3 in just a few more months….
Take pictures of that sweet little crawler. They’re the only thing that will keep you sane when that same “sweet” child is literally pulling the hair out of your head for you.